Fifteen days ago, I rolled over in bed and my world turned upside down.
The walls were moving, and as though I were on a ship during a gale, they did not easily come to rest.
I had vertigo. Again.
This happens to me periodically. When it does, that’s it. I can’t do anything but wait. Then I can slowly get back to my routine, careful not to turn my head suddenly.
This episode passed, as they all do, but I have been left with residual unsteadiness.
They say vertigo is an inner-ear dysfunction. Specifically, it’s when the crystals within our ear canals, which help us maintain our balance, shift. There are manipulations of the head that can help move them back into place, and these are my go-to.
But with this episode, something else happened.
I realized that my vertigo was more than physical.
The Body Has Secrets
Many of us have periodic aches and pains, illnesses, and annoying conditions that make life inconvenient and sometimes feel completely out of control.
We seek solutions that may include medications or various kinds of physical treatments. And of course, we should. But we seldom take a second step and link the sensations we are experiencing with our mental states.
I won’t go so far as to say that our disease states and physical problems are emotional, because although I know this is a belief that many in spiritually based movements hold, I think this is a complex topic.
What I believe is that many of the things that happen in our lives, including our aches and pains, can either a) be signals that other areas of our lives need attention or b) help guide us to areas of introspection that can help us improve our lives.
Stomach upset is an example. I certainly can relate to having it! There have been many times when I was in the bathroom for prolonged periods and was trying to remember, “What did I eat?” Then I realized that I also had been under emotional duress in the few days preceding the episode. It may have been over something that now had passed, but my body was reacting.
I probably won’t be able to change the tendency of my body to react in this way, but I can change at least some of the triggers.
The Body Holds Wisdom
There is research-based evidence linking our body states to our minds. We now understand, for instance, that the gut has a “brain” of its own, separate from the one housed above our shoulders. We also know that emotional states can affect recovery. There’s a famous story about journalist Norman Cousins using laughter to prolong his life when diagnosed with cancer.
Many teachers, especially within Buddhist traditions, view the body as the gateway to spiritual awakening. The poet and Buddhist teacher Mark Nepo has written: “Our heart, mind, being and self is our container of spirit: the one window we have on the world. So, our window on life, in whatever way you want to look at it, is the conduit between who we are and the rest of the world—the rest of life. And we need to take care of that window, keep it clean, and be able to open it, not just look through it
You may be seeing a lot of discussion about the mind-body connection in the context of trauma recovery. Somatic therapy, a form of psychotherapy focused on the body, helps many to release the effects of these life-altering experiences.
Mind-body medicine is an emerging field that also focuses on this relationship. Rachel Noami Remen, M.D., has written about body wisdom from the perspective of a medical practitioner. She often discusses how our thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and attitudes can positively or negatively affect biological functioning. Dr. Remen suggests that healing is not just a physical process but involves the mental, emotional, and spiritual aspects of a person.
So where am I going with this?
Got a Question? Ask the Body
On a recent morning, as I climbed from my bed and waited for my balance to steady, I started to also have spinning thoughts.
At that moment, I realized that the vertigo I was experiencing had a metaphorical component.
I have been thinking lately about a lot of things going on in my life. I worry about my parents, who are entering the second half of their 80s. I worry about the economy. I worry about my clients. I worry—well, I sometimes feel like I’m built to worry!
There are times when I’m lying in bed at night and feel anxiety creep across me. It almost feels like vertigo.
I started to wonder if my vertigo was a tangible signal that something needed my attention. At the least, it was a condition that merited some deeper exploration. I suppose because I’ve been a writer all of my adult life (and even before), I also gravitate to this kind of thinking.
So, it got me thinking: If you are you are stuck, looking for a new job, dissatisfied with your career, thinking about moving to a new part of the country, pondering a breakup, a check-in with your body might be helpful.
Here’s how you can gain some insight:
Sit quietly in a chair or on the floor. Close your eyes. Take a few cleansing breaths and allow yourself to settle into a quiet place.
Recall the quandary. What is happening with your body? Are you noticing a tightening or any discomfort? Perhaps when you think about your options you start to feel the opposite—relaxation. Both are signals pointing you in certain directions.
If you are experiencing discomfort already (such as vertigo or a stomachache), sit for a few minutes and observe what comes into your mind. Are particular worries taking center stage? Are scenarios and stories popping into your mind? These could be at the center of your current difficulties and require further examination.
Most of us don’t make space for this practice. Our lives are busy and noisy. We just push back the discomfort and keep going. Meditation teacher and Buddhist scholar Reggie Ray refers to the widespread tendency to live “from the neck up,” disconnected from the physical sensations and experiences of our bodies, living primarily in their thoughts—ignoring the wisdom and signals of our physical selves—as a cause of physical and emotional discomfort, a sense of alienation, and a lack of fulfillment.
In the case of my vertigo, my connection between physical spinning, my thoughts, and the situations of my life have moved me to make some changes. I’m taking more time to relax, prioritizing tasks, and talking with a friend to get perspective.
The interesting this is that I now am better able to cope with my physical symptoms, and they are diminishing.
One could call this coincidence. Maybe I’m just physically recovering. And I say, that’s likely true, but I’m doing it with greater insight.
As I move forward into the coming months, I won’t forget the impact that this experience has had. As you sit and observe your mental and physical state, you, too might slow down enought to glean some insight. Maybe you will realize that you need some time off before doubling down on your search. Maybe you still have hurt feelings from that layoff.
Maybe you will gather the courage to leave a bad marriage.
All I know it, next time I need to understand why I’m stuck, or search for what an ache, a pain, or bout of flu can help me see, I am going to ask my body.
